Less Than Super

I’d like to tell you about my new web series.

Superhero shows aren’t anything new. In fact, it seems like they’re rivaling crime dramas and procedurals for the spot of most prolific genre right now. There are shows with black and white morality, tortured anti-heroes, bumbling accidental heroes and everything in between. Our goal is not to be groundbreaking. I’m a few years too late for that.

What I do want to accomplish is being relatable. There’s a big movement right now for diversity in entertainment. People want to see more characters like themselves. And while I strongly support calling out the homogeneity of the industry, I don’t believe that diversity for the sake of diversity is beneficial. In some cases, it can even be destructive to the cause.

I don’t just want to see a character like me on television or in the theaters or on the Internet. I want to see people living a life like mine. Because unless you live a sheltered existence, the world around you is diverse. And not just because someone wanted to fill a quota. I’m not looking to start any social commentary or be a champion of a movement. I just want to hopefully give you characters you come to love for reasons that go beyond stereotype. Because that’s what I find entertaining, and I hope you will, too.

http://lessthansuper.com

Pride and Prejudice and Zombies Review

I have a confession.

I've never read Pride and Prejudice.

I've never seen the movie, either. They made a movie, right?

All I knew about it was that it had a strong female character (characters?) and some guy named Darcy who made all the ladies post about impossibly perfect love and I continually got confused because I immediately pictured James D'arcy and was surprised at the number of Jarvis-loving friends I have. (Although not surprised at the mistaken love for Jarvis. I wouldn't mind a man like him in my life).

So that was my knowledge going into the movie. Oh, and that there were zombies. And Matt Smith.

It's now a little over 24 hours since I saw the film and I'm still how I feel. On the one hand, there are some really amazing elements to this movie. Darcy is quite the bad ass, the combination of pretty girls in dresses was never anything less than fantastic and the choreography and comedic timing were superb (I've decided that if the zombie apocalypse does happen I'm finding a group of ballet dancers). 

Unfortunately the rest of the timing fell way below par. The movie suffers significantly from what I like to call "Potterization": putting together snippets of plot points and passing it off as story telling. It's difficult enough to abide by the rule of "show don't tell" when adapting a novel written at a time when verbosity was the norm. I found myself missing nearly everything the narrator told us in the beginning, except he doesn't really like France. I blame it on the Game of Thrones-esque map graphics, they were a lot to take in. Several times in the story we were given information that we were just supposed to accept as fact, despite there being no real evidence. The attraction between Jane and the rich guy who I initially thought was James Franco was done really well. The supposedly conflicting relationship between Elizabeth and Darcy? Not so much. I'm guessing this is what everyone loved so much about the original book, but I just wasn't buying it in the movie. I continued to play the "do they like each other or hate each other right now?" game, and won only because of my knowledge of how most stories go, despite the lack of on screen chemistry. Then there were other plot points that were just jumped to way too quickly. In an effort to not give too much away I won't go into details, but there was one fight scene in particular, between the living, that I still do not understand what happened to prompt it, and it was such a quick scene.

This seems to be a movie that is better after multiple viewings. Not because it has so many layers but because I'm sure that I can enjoy the brilliant elements once I'm not trying to fill in the blanks of the gaping holes left in the story. I would be remiss if I didn't mention the absolutely wonderful performance by Matt Smith as Mr. Collins, although for as much screen time as he had (and I loved every moment of) his character served very little purpose to the story I assume was being told.

This isn't the first time I've had this reaction to a Burr Steers directed film. Igby Goes Down also left me with the "I have no idea what just happened but I think I liked it" feeling. And I'm always willing to give the benefit of the doubt that the gaps of information I was missing can be found on the cutting room floor. But at just under 2 hours, I would have much preferred a longer film with a tighter story line.

I think this will be a very enjoyable film for those who are already fans of Pride and Prejudice, as it's a fun take on an old story. But they too may find that too much time was spent on what's been changed that they miss the familiar. The more I write the more questions I realize I have. So I'll leave it at that and eagerly await the next con I attend so I can count the number of girls in gowns with guns.

Love the One You're With

A few days ago, I sent someone a message of encouragement, stating the belief that it is important to let people know how we feel and how they've affected us while we still can. The next day, David Bowie died. Today, I woke up to news of Alan Rickman's death.

I interned on a film of his several years ago. Although there were several notable actors on the film, Alan was the only one I found intimidating. He carried himself with such presence that his stature seem way taller than 6'1". His movements were very deliberate, and the few times we interacted he made me feel like I was part of something special. There is no denying that he was a person who should be respected, and he reciprocated that respect ten-fold. And as an aspiring actress in both stage and screen, it was truly inspiring to see him work, he was absolutely mesmerizing. 

Since deciding to do Show and Talk, there have two wish lists I've kept: people I want on the show who I'll keep pursuing until they say yes, and the bucket list of people I feel I'll only be able to interview once I'm good enough. Alan Rickman was high on the latter list, the list of people who's personal and professional presence I admire so much it leaves me speechless. Just two days ago I was thinking about what an amazing and talented person he was. Today he is gone.

It's always crushing when a dream guest passes away. Mourning the loss of a celebrity is a very personal, often controversial, thing. Death is always sad, and my heart goes out to the family and friends of those who are gone. But there are some celebrities who impact our lives in some way, whether through their work or just the parts of them they've allowed the public to see. I think it is a very natural thing to feel that loss. For me, it's also more than that. I see where I am, which is not nearly as accomplished as I'd hoped to be, and I wonder if I'd tried harder, if I'd pushed farther, if I'd made more sacrifices, if I could have had the chance to sit down with them before they passed. It gets me to thinking about what things are holding me back, and what experiences I'm missing out on by not being more aggressive at following my dreams. 

There is already quite a list of accomplishments I'll never be able to achieve, for some circumstantial reason or another. I know that thinking about our own death is generally frowned upon, but I may not make it to 69. Will my legacy be as impactful as Alan Rickman's? Of the things that are holding me back, which are a product of my own doing (or not doing)? As death is inevitable, we can choose to let it paralyze us with fear, or let it push us forward. So today, I raise a toast to you, Alan Rickman. May I go forward and make my life as intentional and impactful as yours. You shall be greatly missed, but never forgotten.

Motivation Monday: Kitty Loving

A few days ago a friend posted a video on Facebook of cats looking for affection from their owner, or really anyone in the room. They would rub against them, paw at them, even jump in their lap, all because they needed to feel a connection. It was cute and bold and beautiful. 

There are lots of theories out there about cat people vs. dog people (personally, I like both)! But one thing that can be said about almost all pets is they are not afraid to express what they need, or want. Dogs don't care that you stayed up until 3 am when they decide at 5 am it's time to go outside. Bunnies and guinea pigs may be grateful for you providing them a home, but they'll still ruin your favorite shirt if you let them get too close. And they've all learned the secret of conning us into petting them. 

Physical touch is extremely important, especially to those who have that as a love language. And for those who have other love languages, it's equally important to receive affection in that way. There are hundreds of songs about needing, finding and keeping love. We all know how essential it is. Yet we are very often afraid to be vulnerable enough with people who can provide it. Our pets aren't afraid to walk up to us when they need us, no matter what they're interrupting or how much they're invading our personal space.

You know who else isn't afraid? Babies and toddlers. Yes, at some point in our lives we all knew how to tell people we were in need. But at some point we learned that vulnerability is weakness, or faced rejection and are too afraid to try again. Those things don't change the fact that we need others in our lives. And denying ourselves the opportunity to be cared for often turns into bitterness, which we then take out on others. So perhaps it's time to take a cue from our pets and let others know when we need them. You may find that they need you, too, and you're one step closer to happiness.

Musing Monday: Happy Holidays?

I'm a pescetarian.

You would think I would have considered this fact when I moved to the land of barbecue and brisket known as the South. Even now with the prevalence of elimination diets, I'm still told that I'm the one who's eating habits are "weird" and "difficult." Imagine how difficult it was for me to eat out in 2010!

The very first time I was in downtown Nashville, I was working on a show that didn't have a budget for lunch. I was told that I absolutely had to go to Jack's. It was the days of my iPhone 3GS, so Yelping everywhere I went wasn't really a thing yet. Plus the guy who recommended it also went to lunch there, and I figured it was important to be social.

When we got there, I realized it was a meat and three. Well, actually, I had no idea what a meat and three was until that moment, but I quickly got the gist of it. My colleague who I have since forgotten (sorry!) ordered before me, while I scanned the menu to see if I could just get a three. Fortunately this was an option, although I wasn't particularly fond of their selection of sides, so I just got a two. Most likely mac and cheese and cornbread, because that's pretty much become my staple at places like that. Unless there's bacon in the mac and cheese. Because that's a thing.

I sat down across from my colleague and he noticed my meager lunch. "Oh, are you a vegetarian?" He asked. "Mostly," I answered. "But it's okay," I followed up with quickly. He looked at me with a mix of apology and wonder, as he pondered a life without meat consumption. It's a look I've come to know very well in the South. 

If you know anything about me, you know that I love food. More accurately, I love getting food at restaurants. I also work in industries where I meet a lot of strangers. The topic of food often comes up, because it's more interesting to talk about than the weather. Very often I'll be told about places that have the best chicken sandwich in the state, or a burger that's absolutely to die for. And I just smile and sympathize with their excitement of recalling the meal. I'll even file it away so I can recommend it to someone later. 

What I don't do is make a face and say "Ugh. I don't eat meat." Because I'm not really in the business of crushing spirits. And my dietary preference doesn't change the fact that such a place exists and the person I'm talking to has a fond memory of it.

This is what I think of every time someone is afraid to say "Merry Christmas." It's not an exclamation that says "here's this thing I believe and celebrate, and you must do so, too." The fact is, 25 December is Christmas day, unless you're in the 12% of the world that doesn't recognize it as a holiday, or the less than 1% that celebrates in January. And despite the consumerism it's become, Christmas represents a time of joy and peace. Who wouldn't want that wished upon them?

I get that for many the holidays are a sad time. This year I've had more friends than I can count offhand post about losing a loved one just within the past week. My heart goes out to all of them. And, personally, I've never really been a big fan of holidays in general. But unless I know for a fact it will offend you for reasons you're entitled to, I will wish you a Merry Christmas, just as I would wish you a Happy Monday or any other day of the week/month/year. Because I care about you and want to share the love. If that's not your thing, you don't have to accept it. But the kind thing to do would be to reject my declaration graciously, or show me a way to love you better. Sure, there are people out there who want to shove Jesus down your throat. But they're more likely to stand by and silently judge you than to open their mouths and give you well wishes.

Foibles Friday: The Art of Procrastination

I know, I know. Today is Saturday. And now you know everything you need to about the topic for today.

Hello. My name is Sandrene and I am a compulsive procrastinator. There are many reasons for this, most of which I won't get into. Instead, I'll just smile, apologize and continue on with this blog post.

If you look back a few entries, you'll realize I already wrote about procrastination. So instead of rehashing myself a few days later, I'll demonstrate a key detail that generally prompts my procrastination, which is my easily distractedness, also known as the "ooh, shiny!" factor.

For instance, while writing the 2nd paragraph, it occurred to me that whenever people try to explain themselves, they're often accused of making excuses. And sometimes, that's true. But just as often, people give everything they have and still fall short. I don't think their explanation should be considered an excuse for why they're not good enough. Instead, why not view it as a list of steps they know they need to take to improve. Because we should always be looking for ways to improve ourselves. It doesn't mean we're not good enough as we are.

And now, friends, you see why I've procrastinated in writing blog posts. I really haven't had much to say. At least nothing I can articulate. I'd love to write a post about Star Wars: The Force Awakens, or some insightful end of the year epilogue or even just a clever story sure to make you laugh, cry and be inspired in 5 minutes or less. But it's just not there. Sorry not sorry, friends.

Thanks for reading my completely pointless post. 

Dreaming of Del Toro

Last night I dreamt I was at a pre-production meeting for a new Guillermo Del Toro film. I wasn't part of the team as much as I was helping out, getting drinks and making sure they weren't disturbed. This was a much younger version of me and the meeting was in the house I grew up in. 

Somewhere throughout the dream it was revealed that Guillermo was such a good director because he was able to brainwash his actors into really believing they were the characters. He wasn't the only one, at least one other person in the meeting could do this, too. But Del Toro was beginning to abuse his power, as he displayed when a freeloading family member came over to "borrow" some things her twin had left at the house, then suddenly changed her mind and decided to shape up and become a respectable member of society. 

Although not a bad thing, setting a person on a path to becoming a better version of herself, the team was understandably nervous that he was doing this outside of directing. After the meeting was over we took him upstairs to my attic room to rest, then the others went back downstairs to talk some more. I wasn't expecting anyone up there so I stayed in my room to tidy up while Del Toro slept on my couch. Downstairs the team discussed the predicament and argued back and forth a bit about what to do. One person suggested they "make him forget" (anyone else think this dream is a manifestation of my excitement about Heroes: Reborn?) but another argued that doing so would make them no better than him. 

I can always tell when I'm starting to come out of deep sleep because the events of my dream become more obviously like those of a movie. The me in my dream heard their conversation and kept turning around to see if Guillermo was still sleeping. After the make him forget comment I turned around again and he had one eye open, and it was obvious he heard it, too. I was hanging clothes in the closet and he got up and moved toward me. He apologized, but then began to tell me a series of details, about me and my situation, and I saw a bunch of words and numbers flash in front of me. I protested, but realized it wasn't working on me, so decided to play along, in hopes of overtaking him when his guard was down.

I was suddenly a college student on campus, but my memories and personality were still there along with my character's. I tried to remember as much of what he told me as I could. I saw my roommate at her desk, writing in her notebook. I asked what she was working on and she said "my PAN project!" with a large amount of "obviously" in her voice. A moment of panic hit as I worried Del Toro would know right away I was faking, but I covered up by saying "oh, yeah. You have so many projects, it's hard to keep track." Good one, right?

I then remembered it was PAN week. I started making my way out of my room through the school. My dorm opened up to the main campus area, and there was a long row of tables with students sitting on one side and several students on the other, getting information. I kind of floated past all of them, grabbing bits of conversation from each table, mentally pointing out who was an extra and who had lines. It was very opening sequence-esque. I was trying to figure out which character I was supposed to interact with and what I was supposed to do next when, sadly, I woke up. 

Now I'll never know if my mind was strong enough to beat Guillermo Del Toro. Or what PAN week means. But the idea of a director using brainwashing to do his job is pretty interesting. I'd watch it. Just make sure, if you use it, I get a writer's credit.

My strange dreams usually happen in seasons, so perhaps I'll have another story to tell, soon!

Superhero Saturday: Super Fox!

Let me tell you about my pal, Shannon. 

It's been an honor and a privilege to call Shannon a friend these past nearly two years. She knows my last name, my birthday (more or less?) and we've had sushi (I think?) and many other meals together. We've even had BRUNCH, which is quite possibly the best meal of them all.

I didn't tell her I was writing this entry because she would probably protest and fret. But my definition of today is a dedication to people who do AWESOME things, and Shannon is pretty awesome. 

The thing I love most about Shannon is her capacity to feel. As an incredibly empathetic person, I trained myself long ago to suppress my over abundance of emotions. And while it may be the more socially acceptable way to go about life, society is filled with broken people who are afraid to truly live. Shannon's excitement and energy are uncontainable, sometimes in spite of herself, and it is beautiful and CONTAGIOUS. She makes me feel safe about being excited, too, and I just love that sometimes she can't control it, because her desire to fit in is beat out by her desire to experience life. 

And speaking of experience life, Shannon is a survivor. Like many, she silently suffered from times of depression but instead of letting it control her, she uses it to push through and help others. She loves on people like crazy, offering an abundance of encouragement, and for her birthday and other special times she sets up a drive to raise money for AFSP, her current effort with her husband currently is in the TOP 5 (#3 as of this writing) in the ENTIRE ORGANIZATION! 

Shannon is also a phenomenal writer, a passion she doesn't think she's very good at but continues to do anyway. Why? Because she's tenacious and perseveres and even though she's crazy because she's super talented no matter what she thinks, she will always strive to be the best she can be. And so many people fall short in that regard. 

I won't expound on how she's a selfless, loving, super-fun-to-be-around nerd, because I'm sure others have their own stories they can share. Those of us who know her know that life is brighter with her in it, and those who don't, I hope in some way you get to experience it for yourself, or find a Shannon-equivalent in your world. 

Foibles Friday: Less Than Dastardly

I used to be a planner.

I'd have great dreams about how things would happen, down to what I would say when it did and how people would respond.

The problem with those types of plans is that they depend on other parties to know their lines and blocking. Sadly for me, most people chose to improv in those situations, leaving me flabbergasted as to what to do next.

The result was I went the complete opposite way and stopped planning anything. You can't be disappointed when things don't go as planned when you don't have one, right? 

I make exceptions from time to time. Usually when I have to purchase flights or other people are involved. But otherwise, I take life one day at a time. Each day has enough troubles of its own, right?

The problem with that philosophy is it makes it really difficult to keep up with a project like this show. Planning is the only way to succeed. And don't get me wrong, I've tried. To-do lists, reminders, lots and lots of self-help articles online. Even this blog. I get into a rhythm for awhile, but eventually life gets in the way.

If I am being honest with myself, my aversion to planning goes hand in hand with my more-of-an-issue-than-i-care-to-admit fear of failure. I grew up with lots of high expectations placed on me, and when I retreated from being overwhelmed, I think I left a part of me when I came back out of hiding.

So, dear readers, what suggestions do you have for me? What helps you prioritize your time and get ahead of the game? I'm open to any and all suggestions at this point. I really do want to make this the best show I can, no matter what issues are thrown my way. 

Foibles Friday: Maybe Tomorrow

I could have easily written this post about how I missed blogging yesterday, but that would be too easy. To my credit, I thought a lot about what to write about, but couldn't decide affirmatively enough on a topic that was different enough from all the other things I've written about so far (I apparently have a very limited interest span).

Instead, I will write about what is most likely my biggest weakness ever: procrastination. Case in point, I came up with the topic, read an article about people who didn't become famous until after they were 30, started writing, got distracted by Twitter and will most likely end up watching an episode of Heroes before I'm finished.

I blame my procrastination on high school. Not to brag, but I'm pretty smart. The classes I didn't get As in were the ones I just didn't care much about, and I took all honors classes but was still pretty bored and not challenged enough. As a result, I started finding other things to do, and put off the mundane stuff like school work. Lunch time was for finishing up homework due the latter half of the day and getting started on homework due the following morning. My class was primarily filled with others who did the same, and you know what they say about the company you keep. We all graduated a bunch of slackers.

There are some things that can keep my interest. I've worked for hours straight while editing and can go all day on set without checking my phone. When I left my full time job last June my days were full for the two weeks up until I flew to Texas and California. I know how to be productive. Some days are just easier to be than others.

I believe there are a few reasons. The most common for most people is just not wanting to do it. For instance, I've had a giant bin full of books in the trunk of my car for over a week now, but haven't taken them to a place I know buys books. 1. I haven't felt like going through the books to take out what I want to keep. 2. The place is really far away on a side of town I have no reason to go to otherwise. 3. I doubt I'll get much for my books, so I'll feel like it wasn't really worth my time. When effort < return, I usually opt to just sit and play solitaire on my phone.

The other reason is similar yet opposite at the same time. These are the times when I'm not confident my effort will be enough to yield the potential return. And this is a result of negative speak. A lesson it took me a long time to learn is that anyone who does anything worthwhile has to face a lot of obstacles to get where they want to be. The biggest disadvantage of my high school experience is that I never had to work hard at anything. Everything came easy to me, and when something became challenging, I just moved on to the next thing. And while I could definitely work harder, if I know what I need to do and just need to work for awhile to get there, I have no problem. When I get lost and don't know where to go next, that's when the temptation to pause comes in. 

I used to write a blog that was filled with life lessons. I'm resisting the urge to turn this post into one of those, since I don't really have one. I know what I need to do, but I don't have the answers to fix why I don't. If I did, this wouldn't be my topic for today. If any of you can relate, know you're not alone. Perhaps we can even encourage each other. I hear that helps things be a little less stressful and lame.

Although I'm happy to say I finished this entire blog post without deciding to watch Heroes instead. Part of that is because the battery on my laptop is dying, but I still consider it a small victory!

Wishful Wednesday: Rockstar

Many people may not realize this, but I started performing when I was in kindergarten. Just little skits at first, but when I was 7 I had my first "starring" role in which I also sang. That led to a life of choirs, solos and musical theater.

A friend once told me I had a good voice, but not one that you'd hear on the radio. Always one to step up to a challenge, I decided I wanted to form a band. That dream was short lived, however, when I realized I was a terrible songwriter. But my brief foray into rock stardom (plus my realization of my love of karaoke) made me discover another dream: to be a featured vocalist.

You've been to the concerts where someone from the supporting act comes out. Or, even better, a visiting celebrity guest. That's who I want to be. A surprise duet at a concert, or on an album. I've long said my creative skills are more in enhancing the skills of others, and this is absolutely true when it comes to singing. My blending skills are on point! 

So that's my wish. For people to want to sing with me. I already have a not too short list of people to fulfill this dream with. For some it could be as simple as well documented karaoke, but for others, I have big plans. Fun plans!

Hero Tuesday: Kevin Smith!

Kevin Smith is a really great guy.  

He once shot a film near where I lived, and I was just getting into filmmaking, so like a good young stalker, I found out what hotel he was staying in and left a letter explaining my journey and asking if it would be possible to sit in on rehearsals (obviously I was coming at the whole filmmaking thing with a theatre background). 

I carried on with the rest of my day and called my friend John later that evening and told him what I did. We laughed and joked about wouldn't it be cool if, then carried on discussing our day. So imagine both of our surprises when I told him I had to go because Kevin Smith was on the other line.  

To be honest, I don't remember much about our conversation. He thanked me for the letter and said I wouldn't be able to come to rehearsals for legal reasons. But then we proceeded to talk for the next hour about filmmaking and the struggles of doing things on your own, but also the struggles of working with a studio and answering to people on your creativity.  

That hour flew by pretty quickly.  

In the weeks to follow, I managed to get an internship at the local casting office and actually got to work on set. I had previously stopped by set and introduced myself and gave him a thank you note. When I began working he remembered me and made a point to check in from time to time to see how I was doing. He also made sure I was able to stay on set, even when I didn't always have a reason to be that was related to my internship. 

I walked away from that experience still a n00b when it came to filmmaking, but learned a lot about life and the industry in general. It's so true that the feel of the set comes from the top down. The laid back, family feel spoiled me. But most of all, Kevin's kindness made me feel safe to go after the things I wanted, and helped me realize there were people out there who wanted me to succeed as much as I wanted to be successful. 

Through that experience I realized that anything is possible. It's a memory I keep for rainy days. And planted in me a desire to one day be the person helping others realize their dreams. So even though we never interacted again, I'm thankful for the impact Kevin had on my life. 

Mission Monday: What Would Buffy Do?

The Buffy musical episode changed my life.  

The songs. The dancing. The story. Oh, the story. A hero who got to experience a moment of rest, only to be thrust back into being a hero again. I may have never slayed a vampire before, but I can totally relate.  

It's been nearly 14 years and I still get the songs stuck in my head. It is not uncommon that at least one is the current soundtrack of my life. "Where Do We Go From Here?" is my theme when progress seems minimal but I don't know what should come next.  

So here's the thing. As much as I try to heed the words of Ben Folds and "give the people what they want," I can't plan a talk show based solely on my ideas. So this Monday, I'm asking you what my mission should be. What would encourage you to watch, read and participate? 

Storytime Sunday: Tell Me More

I don't usually write things like this. I prefer to stick with topics that are lighthearted, inspirational or encouraging. But this is a topic that has bothered me for many years, and recently, further thought has made me dislike this character even more. And that character is Sandy from Grease. 

To be fair, I've matured in my opinion. Previously I took issue with the entire musical. Now I can forgive most, but not her. Or, more accurately, her character "development". 

Let's take a look at Sandy. When we meet her she's a sweet, innocent girl. Much more innocent than those she befriended in her new place, and here is where the trouble starts. Sandy is immediately ridiculed for her seemingly prudish ways, albeit by my favorite character in the story, the only one who shows any type of depth. Rizzo later shows us she's got a soft interior and is much more than just the promiscuous girl she's reputed to be. Her fear of being vulnerable is most likely what caused her to give Sandy such a hard time for liking her ex. Not that that justifies anything, but it's a much better motivation than the character development Sandy goes through. But we'll get to that. 

Next up, we have the ballad "Hopelessly Devoted to You" where we learn more about Sandy, like the fact that she's "a fool who's willing to sit around and wait for you." And while not an uncommon response for a girl who's been heartbroken, a better response would have been to go through the five stages of grief, then come out at the end and realize Danny was just an immature boy who was upset that he got caught in a summer fling. But Sandy seemed to have a touch of denial, jumped straight to depression, then jumped back and stayed at bargaining. 

Halfway through the movie, Sandy gets upset when Danny tries to make a move on her. So naturally, her next response is to throw all morals out the window and turn into one of the Pink Ladies, right? "You better shape up," Danny, because Sandy is making up for lost time with her new bad girl image. I mean, sure Danny became a jock because he thought it would please her (although apparently it just revealed his hidden talent, since he got a letter), but in the end, Danny really didn't have to do much to get the girl and the life he wanted. 

I get that this musical is critically acclaimed. The songs are ridiculously catchy, and if "You're the One That I Want" comes on at a dance party I dance and sing along with little reserve. But I can't call it a happy ending. A sudden flip of that magnitude is bad story telling and I just leave feeling disappointed. 

What do you think? Agree with me? Am I way off the mark?

Superhero Saturday: I'm No Superman

I know. I said this day wouldn't be all about comic book superheroes. And that won't be the case every week. But this week it is.  

There are lots of great superheroes out there. And anyone that knows me knows I have a hard time picking a favorite of anything. And while there are some great ones on my top 5 and top 10 lists, my definitive favorite superhero is Barry Allen's Flash. 

Now, in order for me to list a hero among my favorite, I need to like both the person and the alter ego. This is why, and I know the opinion is not popular, I'm not a big fan of Superman or Batman (although Batman definitely has the best graphic novels). I totally get Clark Kent, but Superman is a bit too much of a can do no wrong, goody two shoes for my taste. (I also had a problem with Captain America, until Chris Evans portrayed him. I think I just don't like lawful good characters). With Batman, he's a bit too broody for my taste, and I have never seen the appeal of Bruce Wayne. 

Barry Allen isn't the only one with both personalities I love. Ralph Dibny and Peter Parker come to mind, among many others. But the thing I love about Barry Allen's Flash is that even when he's not in the suit, he always strives to be a hero. As a forensic scientist, he dedicated his life to catching bad guys long before he got his powers. For him, there was no defining moment where he determined to use his newfound ability for good, like with Spider-Man. Barry always knew he wanted to save the world. 

Many people love superheroes because they inspire them to be the best versions of themselves. For me, The Flash encompasses that desire. Whether I am in a position of great power or am the clumsy girl who struggles her way through life, I want mine to have a meaningful purpose, and to be enriching to those I encounter. 

 

Foibles Friday: Hi, My Name Is...

Yesterday I was working security at an event and a man came up who had no credentials on him. When I asked him for them he thanked me for asking for them, then stated we hadn't met yet, reached out his hand and said "Hi, my name is..." I believe he followed with John, but about 30 seconds later I was questioning what he'd told me.

I know what you're thinking. "Sandrene, you just told us on Wednesday how bad your memory is!" Don't worry, it's not that bad yet. Nor am I being lazy and trying to pass off the same topic for two days of blogging.

You see, my conversation with John? didn't end with him telling me his name. He asked me mine, then proceeded to explain "You know the guy who signs all your checks? That's me." He apologized again but said he needed to get through to see one of our supervisors on duty. He'd greeted another security guy who was standing next to me, so I figured his story was legitimate. But as I was internally frustrated with myself for not remembering the name of someone of significance, I realized why I'd forgotten, and why I've forgotten so many others upon first meeting.

I get caught up in the details.

In this instance, I was completely taken off guard. I saw hundreds of people that day, the last thing I expected when stopping him was a meaningful introduction. I was still trying to process what had just happened, what was still happening, and make sure I was still doing my job, as others were still passing by as well. The name, and a common one at that, got lost in all the other things I was sensing and needed to respond to.

And I believe this is the crux of all the issues I have with remembering names. You see, most introductions happen in one of two ways. Either you're introduced to a group of people and are overwhelmed with names and faces you're expected to remember, or it's done the old fashioned, one-on-one way with a handshake. Well, I tell you, a simultaneous handshake and name is a near surefire way to ensure I forget one of those, and it's usually not the one that includes physical touch (I am a kinesthetic learner).

You see, at that moment there are several things that go through my head. Things like:

  • Does he have a strong handshake (and how do I need to adjust to match it)
  • (If a weak handshake) is it because I've offended him, or is this normal?
  • How does his hands feel?
  • (If clammy, wet or something else unexpected) what does it mean?
  • Does he look friendly?
  • Will I need to adjust my accent when I say my name so he understands?
  • How many times will I have to repeat my name before he gets it right?
  • Does he look friendly?
  • Does it look like he even cares at all that we're talking?
  • Does he look scary and I should probably give a fake name?

With all that and more happening, saying something like "Hi, John. I'm Sandrene" becomes automatic and I miss out on the most important detail of the whole conversation. Sound familiar to anyone else?

I don't say all this to make an excuse. But now that I realize what my problem is, I need to figure out how to fix it. It appears this is easier said than done. Today I met a new person and decided to employ the practice of also saying the name after the handshake, assuming that was the over analytical part. Well, perhaps it's because this is such a new practice, but I ended our exchange with "it's nice to meet you ________" (after saying his name immediately after he told me as well), but then my mind launched into "oh, good. That didn't come out as awkwardly as I thought it might. I hope this helps me remember. And now I need to make sure I do the same for everyone else."

And guess what? I still forgot.

Ok, so I only kind of forgot. The "I think he said his name was..." type of forgot, instead of "I have no memory whatsoever of what he just told me" forgot. That's a start, right? *Sigh* The conclusion seems to be I need to shut my brain off at least 80% when meeting new people. 

What are your tips and tricks for remembering names?

Throwback Thursday: I Will Survive

They say you always remember your first time.

For me, the details are a little foggy. I remember I was at summer camp. I think I was 14? Maybe 13.

We had a special activity night. Most of my friends thought it was lame, and I almost didn't go. But my crush was going, and that was enough.

I was scared, but also curious. I hadn't really given it much thought before, but once the idea was presented to me I knew I wanted to do it. And so when the time came, I did.

On stage, in front of my friends, my crush, my mentors, I did it.

I sang karaoke for the first time. 

As the words of Gloria Gaynor left my lips, "at first I was afraid, I was petrified..." I realized a little of that rang true for me. But I was a professional. Performing is what I did, and perform I did do. To the delight of my friends and new admirers. People danced and sang along. It was exhilarating. Later in the week people who weren't even there came up and told me they heard about my performance. I was addicted.

Since that summer, I've sang karaoke more times than I can remember. At more camps, at bars, at  parties. Oldies, current hits, classic rock, Motown, jazz, Broadway, you name it, I've probably tried it. Not all songs have been successes. When you lose your voice even Al Green's "Let's Stay Together" is really high. And you never realize when you don't actually know a song until you try to sing it at karaoke. But the joy is always there. Not just in the applause, but in watching people connect as you belt out their favorite song, or dunkenly dance to songs they obviously don't know, or scream out with you as they sing their part of your call and echo.

Leading a roomful of people in a round of "Don't Stop Believing" or "Livin' on a Prayer" creates a great sense of unity among the crowd, and even those too timid to get on stage will sing loudly directly in front of you, bringing out a side of them they didn't know they had in them.

So that's my throwback. To a time where it all began, my love of one of my favorite activities. "I Will Survive" is still one of my favorite go-to songs when I don't know what else to do, although I have several others in my arsenal, and always love to try new ones. 

Wishful Wednesday: Don't Quote Me

When I woke up this morning and remembered today's topic, my head was filled with Skee-Lo. Which was entirely unhelpful, since I've never once wished for any of those things. (Has anyone ever wanted a rabbit in a hat with a bat? That sounds like the start of a terrible horror movie).  

As the day went on, 90s jibberish was replaced by Stevie Wonder and I was feeling much, much better about myself.

Although as I contemplated his lyrics, I decided that I don't want this day to be about longing for things I no longer or never had. Instead, I will focus on things I can change, either personally or professionally, pertaining to the show. 

I predict this being a difficult day. 

Maybe I should just write about how I wish I could be more self reflective.  

But that's too obvious. Instead, I'll write about another useful skill in which I've always been lacking. 

Memory.

More specifically, remembering movies and television shows. It's odd, because my recollection of songs is pretty strong. But I'll watch a movie and have a hard time telling you anything specific that happened once it's over. And remembering lines? Forget it. I'll laugh, or be moved, and tell myself "that was good! You need to remember that!"

I never listen. 

Maybe it's because my attraction is to characters and not story. As an empathetic person, I recall the way people behave and how they treat each other with ease.  When I think of movies like The Cure I still remember the emotion I felt the first time I saw it, but I just had to look up the movie on IMDb to even remember what it was about, so obviously remembering any lines from it is out. 

I used to think it was because I hadn't seen movies as often as some people. And I'm sure that's true to some extent. But I had friends quoting Guardians of the Galaxy the weekend it came out. And while I remembered the lines after they said them, if put on the spot to throw out another, I would lose the game before it began. 

And I don't even try with movies I haven't seen in awhile. I saw a conversation with friends online where they were quoting Back to the Future and I felt ashamed to call myself a fan of the movie, I didn't remember any of that dialogue. 

Honestly, I don't get it. I like to think that dialogue is my forte when I'm writing. But I never remember anyone else's? Am I alone in this?

On the plus side, rewatching a movie or tv show can often be like seeing it again for the first time, which is often exciting. I felt like that while rewatching Heroes Season 3. Well, until I got to the second half of season 3 and remembered why I suppressed those memories...

So those of you with eidetic memories when it comes to this stuff, any advice for me? Am I too wrapped up in the emotion? Not paying enough attention? Or is my head just filled with a bunch of other random nonsense? Help me out here. I want to be better.  

Hero Tuesday: Zachary Levi!

Let me tell you about my pal, Zac.

First, I feel the need to mention that I don't think Zac and I are friends. I mean, he doesn't know my last name (?) or my birthday and we've never gone out for sushi or any other meal (yet).

But we are also not not friends. And this is one of the many reasons why I think he's awesome and want everyone to be not not friends with him, too.

I was first introduced to the talents of Mr. Levi when Chuck premiered. I had had a long hiatus from television, which lasted pretty much all of middle school and high school, and had just recently begun watching shows again. At the time my viewing consisted of Heroes, which premiered the year before, and getting 24 on DVD through Netflix. I still didn't really have time for TV, but my friend Nick recommended it, based on our mutual love of nerds, spies and Adam Baldwin, and after the pilot we were both hooked. 

Admittedly, the first few episodes I continued to watch because yay Adam Baldwin! But that "Zachary Levy" kid was growing on me. It was during a conversation with Nick after episode 4 or 5 that I realized my mildly dyslexic tendencies had gotten the best of me and I was reading his name wrong the whole time. I looked it up on IMDb to make sure, and from there the spiral started.

Zac loves Jesus, is an unassuming nerd, rides motorcycles and does other adventurous stuff and is a constant dreamer. He's basically the more successful, male version of me. I wish I knew him in middle and high school, because we'd probably be best friends. Or we'd annoy each other with our stubbornness. Or both. Probably both.

The best part about Zac, and the part I rediscover every time I have the pleasure of any interaction with him, is his love for people and his passion to make the world a better place. Lots of people say they feel that way. Few people do everything in their power to live that way whenever possible.

I'll let you Google stalk him yourself to find out all these things are true (but don't actual stalk him, that's bad). Why he is the hero of the week is for a reason not even he knows. You see, Zac has played a huge role in shaping the vision of Show and Talk. So much so, in fact, that I should probably give him a producer credit.

You see, the short short version of how the show came about is that as much as I love late night shows, I was tired of seeing superficial interviews. Five to eight minutes of banter and talking about what the publicist wanted you to say, with very little information about what makes you you. But Zac was always the exception. Even in the shortest of interviews he found a way to share at least a fun story about himself, and I could tell when he was sad he couldn't talk more outside what he was obligated to say. There was always a passion he brought to the interviews. 

And see, there it is again. Passion. This guy has it in spades.

My favorite memory with him occurred in New York City during the run of First Date. My joy of being there to support him AND see my first Broadway show was dampened by also being in town to celebrate the lost life of someone who had been very influential to me. I shared a little of this with him and he was nothing but loving and comforting. His words carried me through the weekend while I mourned with the family, and regardless of what the "official" title is of our acquaintanceship, he was a true friend to me that weekend and I'll never forget it. I also like to share that with everyone I can, because public accolades are in order. As I said, everyone needs to know his awesomeness.

Now, he is not without fault. Biggest of all, he keeps stealing my ideas. Like, seriously. Think about it. Nerd HQ is nothing more than a live action version of Show and Talk. He's accomplished pretty much all of my acting goals: being a Disney prince(ss), being a superhero and being on Broadway. I'm sure there are others, but I try not to think of things that make me sad. Like I said, more successful version of me. 

And don't get me started on Nerd HQ. Or Operation Smile. That's another hero tale for another time.

Lately I've been talking a lot about how important it is to give back (if you haven't heard it yet, it'll be my Mission Monday topic for next week). If there's anyone I think deserves to be given to, it's Zachary Levi. The man gives so much of himself, and I know a blog post doesn't come close to matching what I've seen him do for others and what he's done in my life. But it's a start.

So there. It's official. Hero status for life, that guy. He's pretty swell.